Chelsea Lions Report

This is above and beyond anything that the Report Gurus will put up on the OT4 pages.

For openers, we were poor. We deserved to lose. We missed too many key players, leaving our midfield short of our normal, perfectly adequate strength. There was no one for Graham to pass to, and precious few chances at goal, in any event. We missed a couple of early chances that would have changed the way the game might have ended. But, that's as may be.

Next, not one of their goals would have been scored had we had our normal team. They do not have the skills, but they undoubtedly have one "asset" and that is unbridled harassment, both vocal and physical.

What this became, and from which we suffered, could be blamed on a referee who was far too prone to declaim that the next instance of that offence would be a card, yadda, yadda, yadda. Never happened. If, and anyone who knows me can't deny it, I had been the referee then at least two of their number would have been ejected. (For those not in the know, I am a Class 1 Referee, and an Assessor and Instructor, when …..)

Really poor officiating allowed several of our team to be physically attacked both during play and at stoppages. Poor positioning by the referee allowed this bunch of idiots free shots at us all. Several times I was punched in the neck and face, by their #8, and Matthew was clearly kicked repeatedly in the shins by their #15 prior to a corner kick. Then, members of our team heard #8 repeatedly threaten that he was going to "get" the Royals' sweeper, me. It didn't happen, he hadn't the skills.

It left a sour taste in the mouth, and I do hope that another team will give them their comeuppance. They have, in their team, some totally unsavoury characters pretending to be soccer players. I do hope we meet them in the playoffs and that we have our full team available. It would be a very different result.

I thought that I should add this hilarious email, naturally transmitted lacking the sender's real name:

Subject: Nice site!

Date: Fri, 21 Jul 2000 17:25:50 -0400

From: Majors majors@videotron.ca

To: paul@mattoid.com

We, the Chelsea B-team, enjoyed watching your team fall apart on July 14. Frankly, we saw the tide turning when you commenced yelling at each other and chiding the referee.

Yours was arguably the best team we've had the opportunity to face in our 15 months of existence. It's true, as you suggest, that many of our players are complete novices. We regret the suggestion that our victory was in any way tainted or unsporting, because we'd been looking forward to the game against your team, as we learn and improve.

What's done is done, but if you want to name the date and chose the referee, we'd be delighted to play you again in a friendly game.

Incidentally, we also had several of our better players missing, and they are amused that we were able to win without them.

___________________________________________________

I was going to add a few words of criticism, but, really, need I do so?

Paul Dickins